“The road to success is a straight and narrow path; it is a road of loving absorption, of undivided attention. You attract the things you give a great deal of thought to.”Florence Scovel Shinn
Soaking in Florence Shinn on repeat over the last couple of weeks. The relevancy of her words and how before her time she was in these century-old publications is amazing to me.
I’ve given a lot of thought lately to the concepts of success and passion and noticing where my focus truly lies. Whether that focus is serving me in my grander vision or hindering me from effortlessly expanding.
Sharing my body with another spirit that is completely dependent on me to regulate our emotional state and wellbeing really puts things into perspective. My focus, thoughts, successes, and emotions are no longer just my own but imposed on another being for whom I alone am wholly responsible.
My world looks different now.
As I slip further into the abyss of pregnancy, I’m feeling called to less but better, being internally focused, enjoying my creative projects, and fully releasing any plans or expectations of performance or timelines.
My grasp on reality — hours and days, daylight and nighttime, previous cadences and schedules — is dissolving and I find myself craving the presence of now.
I feel so detached from the experiences and people that I once gave so much focus to. My reality is changing in real time as a result.
I’m being forced to master the art of detachment and to embrace the magic of what is — what I can lovingly immerse myself into, what feels fun to devote my focus and thoughts to.
And so I ask myself daily where my thoughts are, what I’m focused on, and what matters the most right now. My morning journalling has evolved and I write:
“What feels like the most fun thing to do today?”
“Am I being spiritually prompted to take any inspired action?”
“Ask and it is given. What are my requests?”
My faith is being challenged, stretched, deepened. As my energy wanes and I sink into the ebbs and flows of pregnancy, I’m forced to trust and allow. To fully surrender to the magic of the cosmos and mysteries of our God. To be highly selective in what receives my undivided attention and allow myself to immerse in loving absorption in that which makes my spirit sparkle.
I’ve felt prompted to close some doors, open others, and revisit things I considered walking away from.
In early pregnancy, I felt so private and protective of my experience. Now I feel a shift in my energies where I desire to write and share and express creatively again and reestablish contact with the outside world. Albeit taking a new level of consideration to my energy, my heart, and my emotions.
At one point, I thought I would walk away from any online creative pursuits I had constructed for myself. My podcast, blog, social media. I went so far as to consider deleting it all and erasing my digital footprint altogether.
I now see my endeavors through a new lens. One that allows me to embrace a slower pace, see my creations as my art rather than a performance or product for others, and trust that my loving absorption, realigned focus, and divine request for success, community, and leadership in a way that blesses my family as well as other women and their families is answered with a resounding “yes”. Nothing more is required of me than to be present and follow my intuitive guidance for action. There is no system, marketing plan, algorithm, or AI that is more effective than my own power and that of the One who imbued me with it.
I see now that I’m holding all the cards, and I always have been.
I feel greater success cascading into my life in all forms as a result of being in the flow of emotional tenderness, presence with my baby, and surrender to the all-consuming destructive divine feminine as she tears me down and rebuilds me anew.
The road to success is nothing like I was taught it would be, but it’s much, much better.